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Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Today's lesson is.....never play darts against Dave Thornton and let him do the scoring.

Having put the village idiots from Yorkshire firmly in their place I now turn my attentions to Malvern and Westminster and my ongoing battle with Dave Thornton. He has built up a substantial lead of 440 points to 205, having originally claimed he had 500 points. It took several abusive emails to convince him he only had 440 the cheating twat. I managed to claim a couple of 80 point scores at Harrogate by coming 3rd with two collections. His face was a picture of disgust when I told him that a trug counts as a collection, a face that already had a quivering bottom lip as he came 4th with shallots for the second year running. He wins everywhere else but somehow not at Harrogate. It's hilarious actually.




I've decided to bench a couple of celery at Malvern. I had a stick in my collection at Harrogate and it didn't look as if it was in the wrong company so I'll give it a go and see how they compare. I've also got 4 sets of 3 potatoes for a potato collection which won't beat Sherie Plumb but you never know....they might just sneak into the tickets given a fair wind and a blind judge with a drink problem. I checked them at the weekend and they're still fairly blemish free (i've had a few go down with silver scurf during storage) and have reasonable uniformity although they're perhaps a little undersize to compete. But if you aint in it you can't win it!



Last night I went through all of my shallots and regraded them into the best set of nine, plus another set of 12 for the Malvern side which I managed to win last year. Tonight I'll go through my 250g onions as I want to stage a mini-collection which calls for 4 sets of 4 from stumps/spuds/beetroot/tomatoes/250g onions. Ideally you want to stage stumps (18 pointer) spuds (20 pointer) and tomatoes (18 pointer) amongst the four sets for definites. The fourth set needs to be between the beet and onions which are only 15 pointers. As my tomatoes are not quite ready I may need to stage both beet and onions which puts me at an immediate 3 point disadvantage but I have seen it done if the uniformity etc is good.



I'm expecting Dave to pick up good points at Malvern with shallots, long carrots, parsnips and the onion collection so I could really do with a bit of luck at Malvern in order to hang onto his coat tails until Westminster where I hope to be able to catch him up a bit with some tickets in the minor veg classes. This would piss him off enormously and also be very, very funny.

1 comment:

Geoffrey Trueman said...

Yep,you did put the so called Yorkshire Village Idiots in their place.
A bloody level above you by the looks of things.
Geoff.